Clients often ask me this: When do you cut ties with toxic family after childhood abuse? This question doesn’t have a single answer. Each client found a different option. There’s no single right answer. If you are asking this question, though, something still doesn’t feel right about the relationship in the present. I had this…
If you haven’t read the first article in this series, start there: Boundaries for Adults with Childhood Trauma. This article builds on what that one covers — the why. This one is the how to build healthy boundaries after childhood trauma – giving you practical steps and guidance. This isn’t about arriving at some finished…
The 8 phases of EMDR describe the formal structure of the work. That structure is useful. It tells you the shape of the work. It doesn’t tell you how long each part actually takes, and that phases 1 and 2 aren’t a warm-up for the “real” work. For many people, especially those with childhood trauma…
You’ve read the advice. Use “I statements.” Don’t stonewall. Watch for criticism, defensiveness, and contempt. You’ve tried. Maybe you’ve read the books, gone to couples therapy, practiced the scripts until you could recite them in your sleep. And it still doesn’t work. Here’s what most relationship advice won’t say: if your criticism, your defensiveness, your…
Clients have asked me directly, “How do I get out of it?” They left. They did everything right — therapy, boundaries, documentation. And they still keep ending up in the same place: disbelieved, blamed for their reaction while the original harm disappears, wondering if they’re the problem. Leaving an abusive relationship is supposed to be…
As a young adult, I felt drawn to First Person Plural by Cameron West. He described his experience living with DID — slowly uncovering a traumatic childhood that included sexual abuse. I deeply resonated with what he shared. Not because I live with DID, but because I could see the signs of my own childhood…
If you’re reading about types of childhood abuse, you may not think of yourself as someone who experienced childhood abuse. Maybe your childhood was difficult in ways that felt normal at the time — because it was the only childhood you knew. Maybe you’ve wondered whether what happened to you was significant enough to count….
So, here is what I learned I had just finished a session with a client. She explained how she used AI for self-reflection. She wasn’t alone — other clients mentioned encountering AI in their workplaces, often without much choice. I became curious. Can AI help heal trauma? I was bombarded with messages either selling AI…
I was sitting in my car surrounded by other cars. The traffic jam on the highway seemed endless. I felt trapped. My hands started sweating. I could hardly breathe. I saw an exit sign, left the highway, phoned my partner, and told him I couldn’t come. We had planned to spend the weekend in the…
Welcome to Trauma Demystified. I’m Natalie Jovanic, your host on this journey. I’m a trauma counsellor and coach, and I also bring my own lived experience to relational trauma recovery. Today’s episode is Relational Trauma Recovery: What No One Tells You. But before we dive in, I want to honour someone who was an essential…
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Bright Horizon Therapies
Trauma counselling and coaching for adults with childhood trauma, complex trauma and relational trauma. Online across Canada and internationally. Evenings and Saturdays available.
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Bright Horizon Therapies is located on the traditional territories of the people of the Treaty 7 region in Southern Alberta, which includes the Blackfoot Confederacy (comprising the Siksika, Piikani, and Kainai First Nations), the Tsuut’ina First Nation, and the Stoney Nakoda (including the Chiniki, Bearspaw, and Wesley First Nations). This land is also home to Métis Nation of Alberta, Region III. We acknowledge the traditional caregivers of the land and the importance of a commitment to continued decolonization of our work.
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