Many of the clients who choose to work with me are adults with childhood trauma—a journey I deeply understand, having lived through similar challenges myself.
Through my own experiences, I’ve learned how overwhelming childhood trauma can feel and how it can continue to affect emotions, relationships, and daily life into adulthood. This insight allows me to guide clients with both personal empathy and professional expertise.
Research shows that 15 to 43% of children experience at least one traumatic event (U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs), which can lead to a wide range of outcomes—from general trauma symptoms, complex trauma to diagnosed PTSD. Many adults recognize these symptoms but can’t connect them to their childhood experiences.
If you see parts of your own experiences reflected here, know that healing is possible. This article explores the forms of childhood trauma, helps you recognize the signs in adulthood, and offers practical strategies—including online trauma counselling—to support your recovery and empower your life.
Understanding childhood trauma: Developmental trauma in adults
Childhood trauma, often called developmental trauma, occurs during critical years when our nervous system and personality are still developing.
From my own journey and work with clients, I’ve seen how these early experiences can shape emotional responses, relationships, and even physical health well into adulthood.
Because childhood trauma happens during development, it can affect:
- Window of tolerance: the ability to manage stress and regulate emotions
- Attachment styles: patterns of connecting with others
- Personality formation: ways we see ourselves and relate to the world
It’s important to remember that trauma isn’t only about what happened—it’s about how it was experienced. Developmental trauma happens when events overwhelm a child’s emotional capacity to cope with it. These experiences may include:
- Household dysfunction: neglect, abuse, or caregivers struggling with substance use
- Exposure to violence or discrimination: systemic oppression, racism, bullying
- Other adverse experiences: any threat to safety, dignity, or the caregiver’s well-being
The landmark ACE (Adverse Childhood Experiences) Study by the CDC and Kaiser Permanente found that around 64% of adults report at least one ACE, including physical, emotional, or sexual abuse, neglect, and household dysfunction.
If you recognize some of these experiences in your life, it’s important to know that acknowledging them is the first step toward healing. Recovery is possible even years later.
Why childhood trauma matters in adulthood
The effects of childhood trauma can last well into adult life, influencing mental, emotional, and physical well-being. Based on research and my own experience, adults with childhood trauma may face:
- Mental health challenges: depression, anxiety, PTSD, or substance use
- Physical health issues: chronic conditions like heart disease, diabetes, or pain
- Relationship difficulties: trouble trusting others, forming close bonds, or maintaining boundaries
- Inner fragmentation: structural dissociation can create “parts” of the self that hold trauma separately
Many adults with childhood trauma don’t feel safe in the world, even long after the trauma has ended. Learning how to create a sense of safety is an important step in recovery. Check out my episode How to Create Safety After Childhood Trauma: Tips for Adults for practical strategies
Even with these challenges, healing is possible. Neuroscience shows that neuroplasticity allows the brain to recover and adapt, supporting meaningful change.
Signs of childhood trauma in adulthood
Many adults with childhood trauma experience symptoms that can feel confusing or overwhelming, and often they don’t realize these challenges are connected to their early experiences.
From my own journey and my work with clients, I’ve noticed that recognizing these signs is a crucial first step toward healing.
Emotional and psychological symptoms
Adults who have experienced childhood trauma may notice:
- Emotional dysregulation: difficulty managing emotions, intense mood swings, or prolonged periods of numbness
- Hyperarousal or immobilization: feeling constantly on edge, easily startled, or alternately stuck and frozen
- Persistent sadness or anxiety: chronic worry, hopelessness, or panic attacks
- Re-experiencing trauma: flashbacks, nightmares, or intrusive thoughts
- Avoidance and dissociation: avoiding reminders of trauma, feeling disconnected from yourself or your surroundings
- Perfectionism or overachievement: striving for approval or setting excessively high standards to avoid shame or criticism
Many adults tell me that they grew up in environments where vulnerability wasn’t safe. It’s natural that protective parts developed to shield emotions—these parts can make trusting and connecting with others challenging.
Attachment-related symptoms
Childhood trauma can affect how we connect with others in adulthood. Attachment patterns often emerge as:
- Anxious attachment: intense desire for closeness paired with fear of abandonment, high need for reassurance
- Avoidant attachment: discomfort with intimacy, tendency to withdraw or suppress emotions
- Disorganized attachment: alternating between seeking extreme closeness and distancing, difficulty being vulnerable
Keep in mind that our attachment style isn’t written in stone. We can transform our attachment patterns and develop earned secure attachment with patience and persistence.
Challenges with boundaries
Many adults with childhood trauma struggle to recognize or maintain healthy boundaries. This can happen because:
- They grew up in environments where boundaries weren’t respected
- Trauma created a disconnection from their own body and feelings, making it hard to sense limits
- Emotional parts formed during trauma may resist boundary-setting since it wasn’t safe to have boundaries as a child
I’ve seen clients gradually reclaim their boundaries through gentle self-awareness and practice. Learning to recognize one’s limits is an essential step in healing.
Structural dissociation and internal “parts”
Structural dissociation explains how trauma can fragment the personality into different “parts” to manage overwhelming experiences. These parts may include:
- Fight, flight, freeze, or fawn responses
- Protective or punitive inner voices
- Parts prone to self-injury, addictive behaviors, or avoidance
In my own healing journey, recognizing these internal parts helped me understand why certain emotions or behaviours felt so intense in everyday situations.
Recognizing these signs is the first step toward recovery. By understanding how childhood trauma manifests in adulthood, adults with childhood trauma can begin to develop healthier coping strategies, seek effective support, and work toward a more empowered life.
Healing approaches for adults with childhood trauma
Recovery from childhood trauma is deeply personal, and there is no single path. From my own experience and working with clients, I’ve learned that healing requires a combination of professional support, self-care, and practical strategies. The journey of healing from relational trauma, such as childhood abuse, is seldom straightforward; it often circles upward, gaining strength with each turn.
Trauma-focused therapy and counselling for healing childhood trauma in adulthood
Effective trauma recovery often involves professional support, especially modalities specifically designed for trauma:
- EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) for childhood trauma: provides a safe way to integrate unresolved traumatic memories
- Parts work therapy: identifies and integrates the “parts” of the self that formed to cope with trauma
- Somatic approaches: address how trauma is held in the body and help restore nervous system regulation
In my own healing, combining these approaches allowed me to understand my internal responses and transcend the impact of childhood trauma over time.
A structured approach often follows three stages:
- Safety and stabilization – building emotional and physical safety
- Integration and mourning – processing traumatic experiences and acknowledging losses
- Reconnection and empowerment – finding meaning, rebuilding relationships, and engaging fully in life
For more insights, tune into my episode How to Heal from Childhood Abuse as an Adult: Steps Toward Freedom.
Practice self-care and coping tools
Even outside therapy, certain practices support emotional healing and nervous system regulation:
- Mindfulness: meditation, deep breathing, or loving-kindness practices help stay grounded
- Yoga and gentle movement: reconnects body and mind, supports emotional regulation
- Journaling and self-reflection: explore thoughts, feelings, and patterns safely
- Healthy boundaries: learning to recognize and assert your limits protects emotional well-being
I’ve seen clients—and experienced myself—how small daily practices can gradually create a sense of safety, self-awareness, and control.
Building resilience and empowerment
Healing from childhood trauma is also about rediscovering personal strengths and agency:
- Understand and acknowledge trauma: knowing that your experiences shaped, but do not define, you
- Practice gentleness: treat yourself with kindness and curiosity, especially during setbacks
- Celebrate progress: even small steps are meaningful milestones
- Set achievable goals: break the recovery journey into manageable steps
I’ve found that recognizing my strengths—even ones shaped by coping with trauma—helped me reclaim confidence and empowerment in everyday life.
Professional support and online trauma counselling for adults with childhood trauma
If you feel stuck or want guided support, online trauma counselling can be an effective option. Working with a trained professional provides:
- Trauma-informed guidance tailored to your experiences
- Safe space to process emotions and integrate healing practices
- Access to effective modalities like EMDR, parts work, and somatic therapies
In my own practice, I’ve seen how online sessions can make healing more accessible and flexible, especially for adults balancing work, family, or other commitments.
Takeaway
Healing from childhood trauma is possible, even years after the experiences. By combining professional support, self-care strategies, and self-awareness, adults with childhood trauma can reclaim their lives, build resilience, and move toward empowerment.
Remember, every small step you take toward understanding and caring for yourself matters. Healing is a journey, and it is possible.
Sources
This article is informed by my professional training, lived experience in trauma recovery, ongoing study, professional practice, and the works of trusted authors and organizations in trauma recovery, mental health, and social justice. The references below include the books, trainings, and evidence-based resources that shaped the ideas discussed here:
Fisher, J. (2023). Janina Fisher’s Trauma treatment certification training (CCTP): The latest proven techniques to resolve deeply held trauma [Online professional training]. PESI
Davis, E., & Marchand, J. (2021). Attachment and dissociation assessment and treatment [Online professional training]. R. Cassidey Seminars
Vancouver College of Counsellor Training. (2016). Sexual Abuse Counselling Skills [In-person professional training]. Vancouver, BC, Canada.
Whitfield, C. L. (2010). Healing the child within: Discovery and recovery for adult children of dysfunctional families (Recovery Classics Edition). Simon & Schuster.
