Yesterday, I received an email with the subject line: “Epstein Retraumatizing Victims (Podcast Topic Idea).”
The sender wanted to pitch me a “renowned trauma specialist” for my podcast, Trauma Demystified. The problem? I don’t take guests—and even if I did, the headline itself felt sensational and not trauma-informed. It also made me pause and ask: What is retraumatization, and how can I explain it clearly?
Beyond the headline, this moment highlighted something else: I’ve been quiet in my blog about certain high-profile cases—quiet about Epstein, silent about the Hockey Canada case, silent about how these public conversations affect survivors of sexual assault and sex trafficking.
I haven’t been quiet with my clients. And I haven’t been unaffected myself.
One night, I was watching a late-night talk show when the host made jokes about Epstein in connection with Trump. I remember thinking: How would survivors feel hearing this? I belong to the community of people who have survived sexual violence, and I’ve shared my healing journey in my memoir. Those jokes didn’t trigger me, but I didn’t feel respected by the tone. So I disengaged.
This post is for people like me—for people who have experienced sexual assault.
Please know this: I believe you. It was not your fault.
When public cases reignite pain after sexual assault
Before I jump into explaining what retraumatization is, I want to acknowledge this: It’s natural to have a response when cases like Epstein or Hockey Canada appear in the news or on social media. Far too often, the conversations are superficial and based on personal opinion rather than real understanding.
Legal justice is not the same as truth. Legal outcomes depend on laws and available evidence. They do not determine whether your experience was real. And the justice process itself can be incredibly difficult for survivors of sexual assault.
We live in a society where victim-blaming is common. Survivors who share their truth aren’t always believed. Some of them are stigmatized. You don’t deserve that—nobody does.
If you notice an intense emotional response to these stories, it’s okay to disengage. You can log off social media. You can set boundaries with people whose opinions feel harmful. Your well-being matters.
What is retraumatization?
The podcast pitch made me reflect on something important: what do we really mean when we say retraumatization? And how is it different from being triggered or having a natural emotional response?
Retraumatization
Retraumatization happens when a present-day situation significantly echoes the original trauma. It can overwhelm your ability to cope, feel like the trauma is happening all over again, and usually occurs when there isn’t enough safety or support in place. In my professional experience, retraumatization is rare, but when it does happen, it can feel profoundly destabilizing. If you notice situations that feel too similar to your original trauma, it’s okay to step back, take breaks from media, and seek support.
How to differentiate retraumatization from new trauma
It’s essential to distinguish retraumatization from new trauma. For example, if someone who has survived sexual assault experiences another assault, that is not retraumatization — it is an additional trauma. Trauma is any experience that overwhelms our capacity to integrate it emotionally, and what matters most is your individual experience. Only you can know what feels overwhelming or harmful; nobody else can decide for you whether something counts as trauma.
Retraumatization occurs when current circumstances echo the dynamics of the original trauma without being identical. New trauma, by contrast, adds to the existing load of painful experiences. Both can be deeply distressing, but understanding the difference helps you respond with clarity, set appropriate boundaries, and access support in ways that protect your safety and wellbeing.
What is the difference between retraumatization and triggers?
Triggers or activated parts are a normal part of healing from trauma, whereas retraumatization is rare and happens when a present situation significantly replicates the original trauma. Triggers can feel very uncomfortable, but they are not signs of failure or weakness — they are reminders that some experiences haven’t yet been fully processed.
A trigger occurs when something in the present touches on unresolved memories, emotions, or body sensations from the past. Often, these parts of us had to be pushed aside at the time because the experience was too overwhelming to process. They may feel like they are in danger right now because they have lived through an extreme experience. While this may feel real, it often isn’t. Learning to assess your safety in these moments is essential. Doing so can help prevent experiences from escalating into retraumatization, though most triggers can be navigated safely with grounding and support.
Although triggers may feel intense, they are signposts pointing toward areas that still need care and integration. Activated parts often respond to present concerns, and even if the emotional response feels much higher than expected, it’s essential to explore what’s happening — whether it’s a boundary violation or an unmet need.
The goal isn’t to eliminate all triggers. Instead, they can be approached with curiosity and gentle attention (or at least non-judgment when care isn’t accessible in the moment), so that the emotions and sensations they carry can be acknowledged and integrated at a manageable pace. Activated parts generally soften with trauma recovery and can transform as the traumatic experiences they carry are fully processed.
While triggers are expected and indicate unresolved experiences, retraumatization remains rare and overwhelming, usually occurring when there isn’t enough safety or support in place.
Natural Emotional Responses versus retraumatization
Finally, there are natural emotional responses. Feeling sadness, anger, grief, or frustration when you hear about sexual assault in the news is not retraumatization, and it isn’t necessarily a trigger. These emotions are a normal, human response to injustice, cruelty, or disrespect. They don’t mean you’re going backward in your healing — they reflect what matters to you and provide insight into your needs and values. They show that you care and that you are connected to your humanity.
Tools for grounding
If you notice distress after reading the news or hearing public conversations about sexual violence, grounding skills can help you stay connected to the present and regulate your nervous system. Here are two exercises you can try:
5, 4, 3, 2, 1 Grounding exercise
- Check in with yourself and rate your emotional state from 0 to 10.
- Notice and name:
- 5 things you can see
- 4 things that are blue
- 3 things you can hear
- 2 things you can smell
- 1 thing you can taste
- Keep your descriptions neutral (e.g., “a chair,” not “my beautiful chair”).
- Check in again and rate your emotional state.
This exercise won’t erase your emotions, but it can help you feel grounded and present in the moment.
Calming activated parts
Another approach is to work with activated parts of yourself. Here’s a gentle way to do this:
- When you notice heightened emotions, take a moment to check in with your body. Scan from head to toe and notice where you’re feeling the emotion — it could be in your chest, stomach, throat, or elsewhere.
- Place your hand on the area where you feel the emotion and notice the sensations of your hand there.
- Silently acknowledge the part that is experiencing the emotion. For example: “I notice you feel anxious (or angry, sad, etc.). I’m here with you.”
- If it resonates, you can begin to sigh. Sighing is often easier than breathing if you have heightened emotions. It helps you reset your nervous system and return to your window of tolerance.
What is retraumatization: Summary
While there is a risk of retraumatization, it is usually rare. You can reduce this risk by limiting your exposure to public discourse around sexual violence if you notice it worsens your symptoms. You are also less likely to experience retraumatization as you choose to engage in healing from past experiences. Remember, healing is not an obligation — it is a choice you make for yourself.
In most situations, it is more common to experience triggered or activated parts. Trauma counselling can help you navigate these experiences with confidence and work toward resolving the lasting impact of past trauma. Healing after sexual assault is a journey, and understanding the nuances of your emotional landscape is one way to move through it safely and with greater gentleness.
Moving forward after sexual assault
I recognize that this article covers only a small part of trauma recovery. Healing from sexual assault is complex, and the more you engage with your healing, the less likely retraumatization becomes. Though no one is fully protected from future trauma — because trauma is, unfortunately, a part of life — healing strengthens your resilience and capacity to respond.
If you want to explore trauma counselling as a part of recovery from sexual assault, you can find more information in the following resources: Benefits of trauma counselling and five effective tools that help heal past trauma.
Remember:
- Feeling activated doesn’t mean you’re failing.
- Having emotions about injustice is a normal, human response.
- Your truth matters, no matter what the headlines or legal outcomes say.
Healing from sexual assault or sex trafficking is a journey. I can’t tell you how long it will take, but I hope you find your own path forward — one that feels safe, supportive, and steady.
